top page logo

Your place for community & resources to find or create work you love

We are so glad you're here and ready to take the next step! We created 48days.net as a place for community. For people to encourage each other and help each other in finding or creating work that is meaningful.

But frankly, we've outgrown it, so we're moving to provide you new resources.

48Days.net will be closing as it is today on November 30, 2017. Until then current members can click the button below to access groups and resources.

If you're new to 48days.net, connect here for a close up look at our thriving 48 Days Eagles Community and to get weekly free resources and motivation as you find and create work you love.


Every choice moves us closer to or farther away from something. Where are your choices taking your life? What do your behaviors demonstrate that you are saying "yes" or "no" to in life?


— Eric Allenbaugh —



This might sound counterintuitive, but moving forward requires saying “no.” Yet saying “no” is a hard skill to develop, especially if you enjoy helping people. Who wants to be considered rude or create conflict because of saying “no?” At the same time, if you say “yes” to everything, you are actually saying “no” to things that are important. Have you ever thought about it that way? I’m not sure about you, but this entire “yes” and “no” discussion makes my brain hurt.


So, let’s make it simple. Since forward is the direction of success, successful people learn how to say “yes” to decisions that move them forward and “no” to decisions that cause them to stand still or move backwards. They don’t go ballistic saying “no” to every single thing that is not 100 percent mission critical, but they strategically say “no” when saying “yes” is unwise.


Here are a few strategies that will help you say “no” without burning bridges:


Strategy #1—Just say “no.” Just say, “I’m sorry. I cannot do that right now.” Be authentic and even sympathetic, but be firm. If someone pressures you to explain why, tell them that fitting this new thing into your schedule would cause you break another commitment you have made to yourself. If the person keeps pressuring you, repeat what you already said, and if they still won’t drop it, walk away because now they are being rude.


Strategy #2—Just say “maybe.” If you are not sure whether you should say “yes” or “no,” you can say, “Let me think about it and get back to you.” This gives you a chance to think through your options for a while and keeps you from making a decision too quickly.


Strategy #3—Just say “yes, but…” If you want to say “yes,” but realize that you cannot agree to everything being asked of you, be honest. Say something like, “I cannot do this, but I can…” and suggest what you can do.


Other helpful tips:


  • Always be polite, but firm. Show that you are a caring person, but don’t fall for pressure tactics.


  • If you tell someone that you will think about it and get back with her, then be proactive and get back with her. Don’t use this tactic as a way of avoiding a decision.


  • As stated above, if someone wants an explanation, you do not have to give a dissertation. The best approach is to be clear that saying “yes” means saying “no” to another commitment. Time is one of our most valuable resources, and since there are only so many hours in the day, we must invest our time wisely.



A “no” uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than
a “yes” merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.


- Gandhi -


Views: 40


You need to be a member of 48Days.NET to add comments!

Join 48Days.NET

Group Leader
Comment by Kent Julian on October 11, 2011 at 3:59pm
Can be hard for me too...but I always remember saying "yes" to one thing usually means "no" to something else.  Helps me decide which "yes" is more important.
Comment by Kevin Troupe on October 11, 2011 at 10:58am
Good advice...and timely for me. I am a "yes" kind of person but credibility suffers when I can't deliver on that yes. I am faced with diappointing two parties...them and myself.
Comment by Erin Casey on October 11, 2011 at 9:30am
So, so hard for me. But I'm learning! For some reason it hurts less to hear no than to say it.

Coaching Mastery Program

Interested in being a 48 Days Certified Coach?  Check out our elite program here:

Check it out!

Follow 48 Days:

Have a question or want to connect? Enter in some keywords here to see what we're already saying!

Interested in the next step beyond this community - with more hands-on interaction with Dan and other 48 Days Mentors? Check out our new membership site!

Weekly Podcast

Hosted by Dan Miller

Good stuff from 48days

Sign up for the FREE weekly 48 Days Newsletter HERE
Check out Dan's 
daily blog and 
free worksheets
Get the 48 Days App!


Have a question or want to connect? Enter in some keywords here to see what we're already saying!


© 2017   Created by Jon Dale.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service