Often, what we truly need, and want is something that feeds our soul and drives us from within.
Back in High School, a group of friends and I went camping. We were blessed to live within 10 minutes of 3 canyons. You could literally enjoy a hike or some camping within minutes of leaving home.
Being the adventurous souls that we were, we decided to go camping one evening without taking water. We each took a 12 back of soda. I thought how great this would be since my Mom would not allow soda in our home. Less than a mile into the hike to our campsite, you can imagine how my thought process had changed.
For that 24 hours in the woods, all any of us wanted was fresh, clean, cool water. There was a stream but none of us brought filtration equipment. I wasn't sure how my body felt but it definitely didn't feel healthy.
I relate this story to my job history. Growning up I would take care of neighbor's yards: mowing lawns, cleaning flower beds, fixing fences and shoveling snow. I loved being on the move and being flexible. I then ran the sporting goods department of a local department store. Other than working on their hours, I enjoyed it. After a 2 year mission to the Philippines, I took a job with a local bank as a Teller. It was awful and a bad fit but for 3 years I told myself to press on. For 2 summer I painted house. Again flexible and again I loved it.
My worst job came right after college. I thought that I needed to chase something with "security." Ah, that term we are all learning only exists when we create it. I took a job where I sat in a cubicle all day and spoke to almost no one. It was absolutely horrible. Nobody did more than 1/2 hour of work each day.
The past 9 years have only had a few aspects that I enjoy. Repeatedly I kept telling myself that this is what I should do, that I needed to pay my dues. It left me burned out and resentful. Only since looking inward have I returned to that cool, clear, clean, refreshing water. It was there for me, I just chose not to take it with me.
I am grateful for the journey. For it's brought me to this rebirth.