I am writing a non-fiction book titled Bravado! Conquering the Fears of Changing Jobs about the fears people face and why they do not change jobs and follow their dreams. If you would please look at the description and tell me what works and what does not work, or any feedback would be helpful.
Bravado! Conquering the Fears of Changing Jobs
Fear abounds today in the job market for a number of reasons. An emotional upheaval erupts on the body if fear is allowed to control our mind, body, and soul. In Bravado! Greg shows how to alleviate this emotional disturbance, offers much needed encouragement, and provides hope to those who have been trampled and down trodden. He has lived in fear in the past and decided no more. Within everyone is the courage to challenge and conquer fears. Bravado! shows people how to follow their dreams. Now is the time to learn how to conquer fear and live an extraordinary life.
I am by NO MEANS an expert, but I think it is pretty good overall. Changes I would make (strictly personal pref's) -
Fear abounds today in the job market for a number variety of reasons. An e Emotional upheaval erupts wreaks havoc on the body each of us if fear is allowed to control our mind, body, and soul. In Bravado! Greg shows how to alleviate this emotional disturbance, offers much needed encouragement, and provides hope to those who have been trampled and down-trodden. He has lived in fear in the past and decided is committed to live there no more. Within everyone each of us (or "each one of us") is the courage to challenge and conquer (our) fears. Bravado! shows people how will lead you down the path to follow(ing) their your dreams. Now is the time to learn how to conquer fear and live lead an extraordinary life.
I have been told, however, that my diction tends to be a little dramatic or "flowery"
Excellent parallel structure in your third sentence. The book description overall is good, and Eric's suggestions will make it even better. Changing it to second person will have more impact than writing it in the third person.
Thanks Eric for the edits, they benefit the overall structure of the book description. Thanks Ryan for the idea of second person, I will do that. Thanks Randell for the last sentence, be afraid, but do it now. I like that.
I appreciate your help on this. I am going to get it together for CreateSpace in a book format.
I really like Eric's edits, and I would add two more.
I would change the first sentence to: While jobs are not plentiful in today's market, fear is.
I would change the last sentence to: Now is the time; it is doable and within your reach to conquer fear and lead an extraordinary life!
From one who was previously frozen with fear, with that deer in the headlights look, clinging to a claustrophobic, no future to it receptionist's job, who is now a writer/helper/encourager set free by Joel Boggess' coaching.
Good luck with your book!
Thanks Kim. I appreciate your input.