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If you are with other people, friends, family, social group...do you usually feel prideful or a bit shameful in sharing that you are working on an idea for self-employment, or that you have a side venture?

I'm asking this to help me with some branding and positioning.

Thanks for your feedback!

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Thanks for this thread and all you do along with all the others that ask the hard questions. Seth had another post that talks about what you do in it he points out instead of doing what people say to do, listen to their questions. It's the questions that make me stop and think and dig deeper.
It's an honor Jim. That was another great post from Seth. I get so much from good input and insight. But my world has been the most rocked...by folks who merely asked me the right question.
I'm prideful to share an idea with my friends, but I feel unraveling it is the hard part. Mainly, its harder to share with a stranger than people you know.
Thanks for the great response! It's fun just looking through what people are saying. I think of myself as an interesting case here. I read Dan's book because I was feeling unsure about my job, and then a few months later, I found myself enjoying what I do! So I just get to peruse ideas from time to time, without putting any real pressure on myself.

Terry L Chandler said:
Congratulations Andy, on being a new dad AND having a job and a wife that you trust! That's a true blessing!

A number of years ago I heard a fellow talking on the radio about having meaning in your life through your work. He then asked this question: "If you knew you couldn't fail, and you could do whatever you wanted to do, what would that look like?"

I started asking people I worked with that question, and you know what happened? They got angry! I didn't know that until later, much later in fact, but I couldn't believe that a simple question could make people angry. Personally, I LOVE questions like that!

None of us are the same as others, and not everyone likes to think.

I want to commend you on your discretion! No, not condemn you, COMMEND YOU! In this day and age one is wise to keep their ideas from robbers and thieves. Sorry to be so blunt, but I've been taken advantage of and discouraged far too many times to not be a little cautious.

Now, go enjoy the gift that has been entrusted to you, okay?

Thanks so much for letting us catch a glimpse of you, too!

Andy Hynds said:
My thing is that I never seem to build on any small idea that I have. It seems silly, but I think it's because anything I do would be on the side, and I am making enough money in my current job that the need isn't there. Also, I'm a new dad of a two-month-old, so I'm deliberately using more of my free time to be with my family.

All of that aside, I tend not to tell people my ideas (except for my wife) unless I'm 100% certain that I'm actually going to carry it out.
Great question and responses, its great to see others dealing with similar issues. This is my first post here and the topic is something I've been dealing with a lot lately. For most of my short (7 yr) sales career, I've had a long term "fuzzy" goal of going out on my own. I've talked about it loosely but haven't committed to putting into any plans in place. This has changed within the last 3 years and Im currently working on creating a biz plan.

I find that until I am truly committed to a new goal, I will rarely talk about it with other people no matter how big or small the goal or project. I want those close me to know and understand that when I commit to something I will follow through to the end. Only when I fully commit to a project and have a loose blueprint on how I will accomplish, I will start to talk about it with everyone to get their feedback.

Recently, I have started to talk to family and friends about my plan to launch my own biz but this was only after a year or two of serious introspection to determine whether it was something I was willing to fully commit to. I'm not afraid of failing but I am afraid of giving up or losing interest in something that I talked up. I have listened to my share of "pie in the sky" plans from others only to walk away thinking that while the idea is great, the person will never do anything more to accomplish their "dream" and I dont want to be viewed in that manner.

Once I have committed to a goal, I find that for the most part, negative comments (in the form of naysayers) create an intense motivation to make sure I accomplish what I set out to do. I cherish advice and feedback and do a pretty good job of distinguishing between constructive criticism and comments derived out of fear. In general, I take great pride in talking about a new goal and enjoy hearing peoples reaction.

One of my all time favorite quotes is from Theodore Roosevelt seems fitting here:

"It is not the critic that counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. No, the credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and blood and sweat, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause, who at best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

- Theodore Roosevelt, Speech at the Sorbonne, 1910

speech at the sorbonne
Michael - I'm like you, I discern what criticism is constructive, and what is just naysaying from the pessimists. And when I do get the junk, it just motivates me. That quote is one of my favorites!

Have you checked out our newly revamped Free Agent Academy and the June 5-6 Round Table event?

Sounds like you are ready for both!
well, since I know I've been called to do this I always feel pride, never shame, in sharing what I'm trying to do. Yes, I've had plenty of people (especially my family) think I'm wrong/naive/stupid to risk everything for this but I don't care, my Captain has ordered me to charge this mountain and no matter what I find at the top I must charge! Success lies not in the money I may make but in the act of obeying the One who already sees what awaits me at the top.
I share openly with strangers and those who are close to me and sometimes I even say it when no one's around just because I can't believe I have a calling and purpose for my life.
I do not fear death, I fear looking back on my life with regret.
Good discussion here. I'm literally a few days into my new venture (striking out as a consultant in the business I've been in for 30 years) and I'm not volunteering the information yet but when someone asks about my job search, I'll tell them I'm setting up my own business.

I had an email exchange with a friend yesterday (he's in a different line of work) and he came up with about half a dozen reasons why it wouldn't be a good idea. He's a good guy but he never will be described as a can-do, optimistic kind of guy. That had me temporarily depressed and doubting but I got over it quickly.
Originally, we were hesitant to tell many folks what we were developing, but after we saw the need, all reservations went away. While we only do this on the side, we do promote it as often as we can. Recently the police came to our PTO to speak of the subject and I had great talk with the officer there. He was very appreciative of what our business is doing.

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It really helps to have a plan if you are talking to your spouse, especially if that spouse is...your wife. Women are generally wired for security, which is great. We just have to recognize that and let it duly balance out our dreaming!
I visited your website - love it, even though it does make me shudder LOL. My husband has done theatre - now I know where to go if we ever need any trauma makeup. I'll spread the word among friends who are still involved in theatre, too. I hope your sales do increase.

Bob Brown said:
This is a great thread! I don't know if "shame" is exactly the word to use, but it's as good as any I suppose. For the last year I told a number of people what I planned on doing. 95% of their reactions weren't making me feel any better about my plan. I suppose it was my fear of people thinking I would fail (my products are very specialized, not mainstream, but much needed). There were many who said, "you sell what?". And then there was that half-smile on their face that I interpreted as feeling sorry me and my misguided venture that they believed was doomed to failure, but they were too polite to say it. That's when I quit talking about it. So I concentrated on success. I read everything I could on motivation, inspiration, marketing, attitude and faith. I sought out and talked to successful business owners. I listened and learned. I read all of Dan's books, I signed up for newsletters from many of the leaders here on 48days.net. All the while I kept planning and building. Finally, two weeks ago, I launched my website. I have received nothing but positive comments and incredible encouragement. Website visitors are up an average of nearly 1200% each day. Hopefully, sales will follow this trend. This is just one of my seven streams of income. My newborn.

I'm no longer hesitant to talk about what I'm doing. Much thanks goes to the Lord, without who none of this would have been possible, and especially to Dan, Kent, Jay and many others who kept my attitude and motivation where I needed it.

If this latest venture doesn't work out - no problem. I've enjoyed the ride!

I don't know what I feel, other than determined not go go "back there" ever again. It is painfully obvious that I cannot be an employee - at least not for "normal" bosses and companies. I don't know what it is about me, but my bosses usually said they thought that I was after their jobs, and they got rid of me as soon as they could. Maybe it's about them - they're insecure. I haven't wanted any of their jobs - their jobs weren't interesting and they didn't pay nearly enough money! lol

My husband's family, most of my family, and even most of the other people we know haven't been encouraging when it comes to anything we do, or are working toward doing. When my husband mentions that he wants to do voice-over work, starting with doing work for churches (pre-recorded audio, like the announcements, reading the bulletin for the visually impaired or illiterate, and doing vocal shorts for use in sermon illustrations), then possibly for small businesses (professional voice-mail messages and telephone trees, for example), people hint that he should just get another job.

When I mention what I'm doing, such as tutoring at the local children's home, or writing and editing for websites, most of my family members either change the subject immediately or just turn and walk out of the room. Huh? It only took a couple of times for me to get the hint, so I don't talk about that (or any of my life, really) with them.

I would love to be further along in the process than what we are, but we are where we are. I'm not ashamed of anything. Just the fact that I am still alive is something to be proud of, and something for which I glorify God. Anything else is tinsel. If anyone should be ashamed, it is the people who are black crabs, not the ones who dare to think, who dare to take risks, to put it out there, the ones who dare to fail. I don't care if I do continue to fail, even a hundred times. As long as I am learning, growing, improving, and doing whatever it is that God has for me to do, I will be a better person than I was.

I would love for us to be able to live on our income streams, and to give away money like crazy people, and there will come a day when we do both. I wish encouragement to everyone here!


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